Your body really IS a temple.

I have come to realize that when you mix a mirror and your mind with Satan you get a really sick combination. There's nothing wrong with mirrors. They were a fantastic invention. And the human mind? AMAZING. But I guess when you put Satan and his "angels" into anything you get a sad turnout.
When I look in a mirror, I have a hard time being okay with what I see. Or at least, I did, starting in elementary school, all the way through middle and high school.  Even now. But that is changing.
Lately, I've been thinking about how my body is a temple. If you grew up in the LDS church, then you've probably heard that hundreds of times. Talking about tattoos? Your body is a temple, don't defile your temple. Word of Wisdom? Your body is a temple, don't drink alcohol or do drugs. Simple. There is more to this than I ever thought about though.
My body is a temple. It was created with great care by the greatest being in the universe, Heavenly Father. It was created so that my spirit could come to earth and have a place to dwell while here. The only way for my Spirit to get back to Heavenly Father is to come to Earth and join with a physical body. My body is also a place for the Holy Ghost to dwell. He guides me and comforts me. I can't make it through the time on Earth without the Holy Ghost.
Now, what does that have to do with mirrors and Satan?
Satan knows that my body is a temple for my spirit and the Holy Ghost. He knows that I can't get back to Heavenly Father with a broken spirit and a dirty temple.
With that knowledge he attacks me! Not physically. He can't touch me. BUT, he CAN and he WILL whisper to me. He will try to convince me that I am ugly, weird, awkward. He will trick other people into believing that they know what beauty is, so that they can tell me if I'm not.
For example: I'm white. I. can. not. tan. In America, being tan is "beautiful", and it really is, but so is being fair skinned. I didn't know that though. I just thought, "if only I was able to tan. I would be more beautiful." I, not only, have my own thoughts telling me that I should be more tan, I have friends that tell me that too. I've had friends look at my arms after a long winter and say "Wow, have you been outside at all?" or "Kinsey, you just need to go outside and tan." (I tried, it resulted in a horrible sunburn, ouch!) Look people, I don't tan. It doesn't happen that way. I'm learning though, that Heavenly Father made me this way. He gave me fair skin. He carefully picked out the color of my skin, the color of my hair, the color of my eyes. He decided I should be "this tall" and "this wide". "Her feet will be this size."
"She will be allergic to cats, and dislike these foods."
"Eventually, she will learn to like certain foods, but others she will decide she still doesn't like."
"She will be quiet, she will be stubborn, she will be a little quirky, but I want her to be that way." "She'll be her mom's best friend, kind to those around her, and love those with disabilities."
"She will cry a lot, but she'll get used to it and learn to carry tissues everywhere."
I have been thinking about this a lot. God made me the way I am for a reason. Instead of trying to be like others around me, why am I not embracing WHO I AM and loving myself?
If my body is a temple, then I need to treat it like one. I need to be kind to it. I need to take care of it. I need to love it, and it's creator.
I need to shove Satan out. (Get thee hence, Satan!)
I need to ignore others judgments.
I'm white. That's not bad.
I'm short. Embrace it, Kinsey!
I blush a lot. God made me that way.
The list goes on and on. I had a list of things I wish I could change about myself, it gets shorter the more and more I think about this.
I'm learning that I want my temple to be clean and healthy. I exercise for myself. I eat healthy for myself. I love myself and praise God.
It's my temple, and I will take care of it and love it, because it was a gift from my Heavenly Father.
It's as simple as that. 

Testimony

This year at BYU I have grown so much spiritually, mentally, and socially. 

I have also gained confidence and self-esteem. 

With all of that growth, I made it my goal to bear my testimony on the last Fast and Testimony meeting of my first year at BYU. 

Every Fast and Testimony meeting before that, I start to think about my goal and I start to panic. Public speaking is NOT my specialty. 

It terrifies me. 

For months, I've planned to do this, and every time I think about it I start to get knots in my stomach, and have a little bit of a harder time breathing.

It's been worse lately because tomorrow is the day that I need to bear my testimony. 

(AHHHHH so stressful!)

But anyways, I think it would be easier to do if I write my testimony on here first. 

It won't be very eloquent, I'm not very good with words, but it's all I've got. 

So, here I go.

Before coming to BYU I didn't really have a testimony. 

I felt a little bit lost all through high school and I ended up coming to BYU not knowing what I truly believed. 

Everything has changed since then. 

Coming to BYU probably saved my life. 

If I've learned anything since coming here it's that my Heavenly Father loves me so much. 

He loves me no matter what I've done, He loves me when I stumble, He loves me when I fall, He loves me when I mess up over and over and over again doing the same things. 

He loves me when I make mistakes and He loves me unconditionally. 

There is not a single thing I could do to make Him not love me.

I know that my Heavenly Father wants me to be happy. 

I know that he blesses me so much more than I even realize or recognize. 

Even though I don't appreciate the things He does for me as much as I always should, He continues to bless me with a beautiful Earth, with an amazing ward, with fantastic friends, family, and roommates.

I know that this church is true. 

I know that the gospel is true. 

I know that my Savior died on the cross for me, to give me second chances. 

I know that Jesus Christ lives, and that He knows what I go through.

I know that He knows me, He knows everything about me. 

He knows when I am sad, or mad, or happy. 

He knows what I love and what my passions are. 

He knows what my struggles are and understands how I feel.

I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet, and while I don't know every single detail about church history, I believe that he saw Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father. 

I know that he translated the Book of Mormon so that I could read it and have a testimony of Jesus Christ and of past prophets.

I know that I don't need to worry about the future too much. 

I know that if I do what I'm supposed to do, follow the commandments, and listen to the guidance that the Holy Ghost gives me I will be okay. 

I will be taken care of and everything will be alright. 

I just need to trust in my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.

There are so many things that I know now, but I'm going to stop there. 

My testimony is very simple, but a testimony doesn't have to be amazing and eloquent and good enough to put in a magazine or a book. 

It just has to be what I feel, and I these things are what I feel. 

I'm so grateful for all that I have learned and the knowledge I have gained since coming here to BYU.

I love this church, and the gospel. 

I love my Savior and my Father in Heaven, I would be lost without them.

I'm still really nervous about tomorrow, but I know that Heavenly Father will give me the strength to accomplish my goals.