Friday, February 2, 2024

Reflection 2023

It's a New Year and my last blog post was my reflection post for 2022. Oops. That's alright though, because my yearly reflections are a summary of the year as a whole and all of the different things I experienced and learned. And maybe if I'm feeling ambitious I will go back and work on the rest of the year, but I might just try to give myself grace and let this year go, and try again for 2024. 

First things first, let's see how much the kids have grown! First photos from Christmas 2022, second photos from Christmas 2023

Rose



Lucy



Quinn


Can you believe the change in Quinn???? I can't believe how big he has gotten! 

1. What did you do on your birthday and how old did you turn?

This year for my birthday, Ryan and I dropped the kids off with Jason and Lisa and had a staycation at home. On Friday afternoon we drove to Salt Lake and I tried out some dumplings at a tea house (the name is blanking for me, it was in a slightly sketchy part of Salt Lake, so I don't imagine I'll be going there again any time soon.) Afterwards, Ryan and I drove to the Cathedral of the Madeleine. Ryan had to use the bathroom SO bad when we got there but when we went inside they didn't have bathrooms open to the public. Luckily Ryan works in Salt Lake so we drove over to one of the buildings he works at and he used the bathroom there, then we went BACK to the cathedral to go inside. 😅 Next we visited the Gill Gardens where we had an interesting and long conversation with a homeless person. That night, we went to dinner at a favorite sushi restaurant in Salt Lake City (Kyoto Sushi), and ate a TON of food. They were so kind to us and we had the best time. On Saturday, we put together a bunkbed and rearranged the girls' bedroom.  That was a bit of an ordeal haha, but we pushed through and got it done. We took a break to have lunch at my now favorite Thai place (Thai Neighborhood Cuisine, here in Provo. It's the best) For dinner, I gave Ryan a break from all the asian food and we got pizza at Via 313. My married name is Vorkink, but I come from Warburton's, and Warburton's just love food, so what's a birthday staycation without planning on delicious food for every meal? 😂 On Sunday, we picked up the kids and celebrated Lucy's, Uncle Preston's, and my birthday together with everyone. 







2. What are your strongest memories from this year and why?

I think if I had to summarize 2023 it would be the feeling of "keeping up." All year long I've just been trying to keep up with life as a mother of three, a part time photographer, and the wife of a husband who has been working and in school, both full time. But with all of our many responsibilities, we still managed to have a lot of fun. We took the kids to Disney with Ryan's family, we went camping the most we've ever done in a year and to some really beautiful campsites, my sister got married, the kids and I went to Texas to visit my parents twice, I started homeschooling Rose for Kindergarten, Quinn went from being a really chill baby to full fledged toddler who is all boy all the time haha, Lucy took her first dance class and Rose did her second, Lucy became potty trained, we went to Bryce Canyon for my first time, AND Ryan finished his degree!!! Woohoo! 

Gosh, have you ever seen cuter kids???


3. What did you do this year that you'd never done before?

We took the kids to the Midway Ice Castles with Tressa and Preston and I thought it would be so magical (and it is!). We dressed the girls in so many warm layers and bought hand warmers and then put their Anna and Elsa dresses on top of all the layers (under the snow jackets though) and I thought they would just be so obsessed with being in an ice castle like Elsa.... BUT Rose hated it. She whined every step of the way because her feet were cold. If I ever go again, it will be with just Ryan on a romantic date haha. It is incredible though. 

I visited Bryce Canyon (So beautiful! I'd love to go back when it's warm!) 

I started homeschooling Rose (That's been a doozy...but we're figuring it out 😅)

I went to Disneyland (I grew up in Florida, so I've been to Disneyworld a few times, but never to Disneyland!) 

I took the kids to the hot air balloon festival that Provo has for the 4th of July, which was so much fun! We loved watching the balloons blow up and take off into the sky. 

We took the kids to two temple open houses (Saratoga Springs temple and Orem temple) those were probably two of our best days together as a family. It was so special to get to walk around inside and outside with our kids. 

I've done this once before, but it feels noteworthy. In March, I went to the Holi festival with my friends, Johanna and Angi, and we had so much fun throwing colored powder and eating yummy food. 

Rose and Lucy got to get their nails done at a nail salon for their first time the week that Emily got married. They picked different shades of pink and purple for every fingernail. It was very cute!

We got a Costco Membership, which we don't really use very often, but we bought a deep freezer for a great deal, which was one of our favorite purchases this year. And we can go for a fun family  activity when we run out of ideas haha.

Rose had her first 2 cavities this year. It was devastating (for me!) She was very nervous, I was very nervous. She was worried about getting a shot, and I was worried about everything else, plus her getting a shot. We went, she got a shot in her arm which she was highly offended by, and she demanded they get her a bandaid, and then she passed out. Then they took her back to work on her teeth while I waited in the lobby. I've never seen anyone wake up from anesthesia before so it was kind of trippy, but the anesthetist was great at explaining everything that was happening. I had told her that we could get ice cream when we were done and the very first thing she said in her very drunken-like state was "Ice seeeeeeam" with a goofy grin on her face. Then when I asked her how she felt she said "my arm hurts! They gave me a shot!" haha which was the only thing she remembered, but she didn't even know anything had been done to her teeth. We made it though! Hopefully we don't have to do this again for a long time! 

I don't know if this fits in right here but we threw a big party for my grandparents who celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary! I sneakily collected photos of them from when they first got married until now and put together a slideshow. It's a memory I don't want to forget from this year. 


4. What did you want and get?

A mini vacuum! (So convenient for the many many crumbs and messes all over our house!)

Some flare jeans!

A new couch! (I've been wanting a new couch FOREVER, Ryan didn't think we could get a real couch to fit in our apartment, but we found the most comfortable couch ever at DI for $80, bit the bullet, brought it home, and the rest is history. I don't know if I've ever been so thrilled with a piece of furniture in my life.) 

A stroller wagon! (Probably my favorite purchase of the whole year. Although, it might be tied with the couch.)

A deep freezer! Our fridge/freezer is kind of small and we wanted to be able to freeze more meat and freezer meals, which we can now do! It's made food storage much easier for us. Ryan is thrilled. 

New bedding! I've been wanting new bedding for ages. Ryan sleeps hot and I like to have lots of blankets, so we've just been using separate blankets for years. But I did the Summer reading challenge at the library and WON the grand prize of a $300 Amazon Gift Card! And I used all of it to get new bedding haha! We got a new comforter, duvet, and pillows that are supposed to be more cooling than other bedding and we bought some new sheets at Costco. When we manage to make up our bed, I'm so happy! 

A space heater, which has been so nice when I'm washing dishes in the kitchen this winter. Our heating vents work great in the bedrooms and not so great in the living room and kitchen, so it's been nice to just carry the space heater around wherever I am instead of cooking the kids in their rooms during nap time in an attempt to warm up the kitchen. 😅

A lot of fun time with family

5. What did you want and not get?

A trip outside of the United States. (But 2024 might just be our year!) 

To send Rose to Kindergarten at a public school 😅

Peace and quiet and a clean house 

6. What would you like to have next year that you didn't have this year?

- I would love a house that has enough space for my kids to run around and just be kids. I don't know if this is our year for that, but I'm ready. I love where we live, our ward has been so amazing the last 4 years and I have so many friends that I think I really needed for this season of life, and I love being in the heart of Provo with so many fun activities readily accessible right around us. But, I know the kids would thrive and homeschooling would be more fun if we just had a little more room to grow. 2024 might not be the year for a new home, but it is the year we're going to start figuring out how to make it happen as soon as possible!

7. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions and will you make more for next year?

- I tried something different last year. I made a more/less list of resolutions. A list of some things I wanted to more of (which included: more consistent house cleaning, more one on one time with the girls, more dates with Ryan, more self compassion, more noticing the good, more joy, more prayer, more pictures of Christ, more asking for help), and a list of things I wanted to do less of (including: less comparison, less judgment of others, less complaining, less instagram, less snapping at the kids). The problem I ran into was that I didn't put this list anywhere I could see it and since most of these goals are kind of ambiguous (and less quantifiable) I forgot all about them. I normally have things in my head that I know I need/want to work on to better myself, so the year wasn't a complete loss, but I wrote my list down this year and I'm going to tape it up next to my bed. 

I got better at cleaning the house more consistently (which maybe doesn't even matter because despite my cleaning every day, the house still looks like a bomb has gone off as soon as my kids wake up. I did worse at one on one time with the girls and with Ryan. But I'm hoping that once Quinn isn't constantly getting himself into trouble, I can relax a little more and have more quality one on one time with each of the kids. And this might be the year that Ryan and I find an actual babysitter, or make a plan to go on more dates, because we did a horrible job at going on dates in 2023. I do think I felt more joy, more gratitude, and more self compassion this year. I have pictures of Christ that I want to hang up, but my goal for 2024 is going to be to buy frames and actually hang them up. 

Instagram is a constant battle for me. But I went the month of July and the month of December without Instagram or Facebook and I feel really proud of myself for that. Every year I get a little bit better and not judging others. That's a tough one, but I want to be more Christlike and I want to see others the way He sees them, so I'll keep working on it! I went to therapy for most of the year and made a lot of progress with being more patient with the kids. I figured out some of my trigger points and I figured out some things that help me to feel more calm when everything feels out of control, and I'm really proud of myself for overcoming some really difficult (for me) stages of parenting. 

My goal with the more/less lists was to give myself some grace from some of the expectations I have for myself, in a season where my life has more that is being demanded of me than ever before. So, I don't have have to beat myself up for not being perfect, or for not reaching very specific goals like I have in years past, I can just look at my lists and say "did I do more of these things or less of those things in 2023?" and I think I did. What a successful year! 

8. What was your biggest achievement of this year?

Some achievements from 2023

- I potty trained Lucy!

- I've been teaching Rose to read and she's been making a lot of progress!

- I went to therapy and made a lot of improvement in how I respond to stressful situations.

- I've exercised very consistently at the gym. Ending the year going to 4 exercise classes a week!

- I read 71 books! 

- I spent 2 months off of social media.

- I went to the temple every month

- I read the entire New Testament and finished the Book of Mormon at the same time, and learned a lot during my studies.

- We also started reading the Book of Mormon everyday* (Mostly everyday haha) as a family. We only read one column per day, so it feels really doable and it has felt really nice to be introducing such a special book to my kids! 

9. What was your biggest failure?

I feel like my biggest failure in 2023 is that I didn't create a good morning routine for myself to start each day on the right foot. Instead of waking up an hour before my kids wake up, I've been sleeping in, making it so I don't pray to start my day, I'm grumpy and sleepy while I get breakfast for the kids, and I'm disorganized. I would really like to make a change for 2024 so that I am better prepared each day to fulfill my role as a mom. 

10. What did you rely on when you were overwhelmed?

Fresh air, exercise, reading books, eating, breathing, therapy, talking to Ryan.

11. What are your strongest recommendations for entertainment from this year?

Ryan and I rewatched all of Modern Family, Psych, and just started rewatching all of Monk. It's been so fun, and has given us an easy way to spend time together in our very limited time together when we are both too tired to do anything else. We have loved reconnecting with some of our favorite shows and characters.

In 2023, I read a lot of books. More books than I have probably read in one year since middle school. It was so much fun. My favorite books were: Hello Stranger (Katherine Center), A Man Called Ove (Fredrick Backman), all of Sarah Eden's Seeking Persephone and Jonquil Brother series', Remarkably Bright Creatures (Shelby Van Pelt), Vera Wong's Unsolicited Advice for Murderers (Jesse Q. Sutanto), and Anxious People (Fredrick Backman)

Our favorite things to do this year have been to play outside (making fairy houses/restaurants, looking for roly poly's, coloring with chalk, and eating dirt in Quinn's case), eat picnics in the backyard, go on nature walks in Provo Canyon, have playgroup with our friends who have kids the same age as my kids, exercise classes at the rec center, swim at the pool, traveling to Texas to hang out with my parents, visit Grannie and Papa, have dance parties/shows in the living room, running into our friends around town, have friends over for dinner or games, watching movies (the kid's favorites this year were: Puss in Boots 2, The Super Mario Brothers, any of the many Barbie movies or Tinker Bell movies, Ruby Gillman Teenage Kracken, Croods, Annie (specifically the soundtrack), Boss Baby are the ones I can think of off the top of my head. We watch a lot of movies though. If the kids could pick a favorite form of entertainment, it would be movies.





12. What song will remind you of this year?

I introduced to the girls the Annie with Jamie Fox in December and we have listened to the soundtrack a bunch of times since (mom hack: listen to It's a Hard Knock Life while cleaning so your kids can pretend that they are orphans being forced to clean up. It's highly effective 😂)

We listened to a bunch of For King and Country this year.

One of mine and the girls favorite songs was "What do You Say to That?" by George Strait. My cousins, Austin and Mikayla, sang it at Austin's wedding in May. It's the song their mom and dad, my late Aunt Lori and my Uncle Steve, danced to at their wedding and I'm pretty sure my cousins had the whole room in tears. Since the wedding, we have listened to the song a bunch of times on long drives, and it's one of my favorites. 

We listened to the primary program songs a bunch in preparation, and Rose's favorite song is "He Sent His Son" 

On my own, I listened to Shania Twain, Celine Dion, Tim McGraw, Cody Johnson, and Faith Hill often. 

13. What was your most enjoyable purchase?

I have so many! We bought a stroller WAGON which has been so amazing for walking around the farmer's market, walking to the library and the pool, for walking around the block. We tried to bring it to Disney, but they told us it wasn't allowed. But it really was just so great for carting our 3 kids around all summer and fall. 


I could do an entire ode to this wagon. I had to limit myself to only 2 photos of my kids riding in the wagon this year. We've put MILES on this thing. I love it so much!

We got a new couch. Our old couch (futon) has never been very comfortable. It's not big enough for all of us and Ryan always claimed the most comfortable spot. I hated that couch by the time we got rid of it. I looked on Facebook Marketplace for hours, but I knew that if I didn't find the perfect couch for a steal, then Ryan wouldn't be interested in trading it out. But one night we were at DI and I saw a couch that was in great condition, was really big and looked so comfy. I sat down and then said "Ryan, do you want a new couch?" He said, "no." and then sat down on the couch and immediately changed his mind. That night we had two couches and a giant love sac (my other despised piece of furniture that Ryan loved) in our kitchen/living room. It was annoying for a few days until we took care of the futon and then another month before we sold the love sac, but now we have the best couch in the world in our living room. And I'm so happy about it. Also, it was only $80! 

For Christmas I bought a space heater and a mini portable vacuum. Both items that have made my life so much easier. The space heater I'll turn on in the kitchen when I'm cooking or doing dishes, so now I won't avoid the kitchen all winter long! And the vacuum is awesome for cleaning the couch, or other random crumbs that inevitably end up everywhere since we have 3 young kids who don't like to clean up after themselves yet. 

And then obviously any expenses incurred from our traveling to California and my trips to Texas were also some awesome ways to spend our money. 

14. Did you travel? If so, where?

February: Boise, Idaho - We took this trip to go visit our dear couple friends who decided to move all the way up to Idaho a few years ago and we miss them. They are so much fun to visit and we had a great time. We took all the kids to story time at the library which was fun but slightly chaotic. Visited a super fun interactive children's museum. And on one of the days Erynn and I had a girl's outing where we got our nails done and then visited her favorite antique store while Ryan and Nathan watched the kids. We stayed up late playing games and had tons of fun in a few short days.   

Somehow, I don't have any pictures from this trip besides this. But Rose and McKay make some pretty cute friends!       

March: Round Rock, TX - The kids and I traveled to Texas to stay with my parents. The plane ride was rough. I had burned my arm the day before flying out and my arm was scabbed over. Quinn was a very active lap baby and the girls fought almost the entire time... and kept kicking the seats in front of them which led to one women turning around and asking if I could get them to stop... which wasn't as easy as telling my kids to "stop!" The burn on my arm kept getting scraped and I was VERY grumpy. To top it all off, when we were walking off the plane, Rose fell on her face on the concrete and scraped her forehead. She was inconsolable and isn't one of those kids who is magically healed with a bandaid. Luckily, by then I had my parents with me to help with the situation. Annnnnyyyyway, we always go for 2 weeks which makes exhausting flights worth it. I was especially thrilled to be going in March so I would get to see the fields of bluebonnets and they didn't disappoint! I took some very cute pictures of my kids in the flowers and had a fun photography session of my favorite painting teacher and his family in the bluebonnets too. We ate all of my favorite Round Rock foods (Round Rock donuts, Chuys, my dad's pancakes, fondue). I went on a food tour around downtown Austin with my dad, which was our birthday present to him, and that was tons of fun, we tried out some really delicious new foods and got to see some fun spots around Austin. My mom put together the most fun sensory bins for the kids and decorated the cutest little room for the girls to sleep in. The girls spent many hours playing in the backyard with a little tea set and it was just such a nice trip. Other highlights from the trip: Rose and I saw a giant snake while walking along the creek, we spent a day with the Parkers riding around on their 4x4, playing in a little blowup pool, and eating lunch. We fed ducks at the neighborhood pond, We love going to Texas! 









May: Gunlock Reservoir - This was our first camping trip of the year. (After one too many freezing cold camping trips, I've told Ryan that I won't be doing anymore camping trips before April). This campsite was RIGHT next to a reservoir and had the cleanest/nicest campsite bathrooms I have ever seen. Gunlock is in Southern Utah, near St George. We had fun playing on the "beach" looking for rocks, watching the cows when they walked through the campsite, and visiting the Gunlock Falls. It was amazing because a few years ago, Ryan and I found this place while on a trip to St. George and we walked through where the falls are, but it was all dried up so it was just this super cool hiking area full of fun nooks and crannies of red rock. This time there was so much water rushing through and also a ton of people who were there for the same reason as us. As is our usual while camping with Ryan's family, we hit a snag when Jason's canopy broke on a super windy day and our second day was very sunny and we all probably had some degree of heat exhaustion. Oh and there were a lot of poky things. Rose is my kid who doesn't like to be uncomfortable (I don't know where she gets it 😅) and she told me that she NEVER wants to camp here AGAIN! because of all the goatheads she stepped on. But we really did have a nice time and it was so beautiful. 












June: St George and Newport Beach, California - This was a trip with Grandpa Jason, Grammy Lisa, Allison, Paige, Isaac, Tressa, Preston, Wesley, and Megan. We stayed the first night in St George and a fun little airbnb that was so nice for our small family. They had a hot tub that Ryan and I were able to sit in after we put the kids to bed. We had Olive Garden for dinner (the same Olive Garden where Ryan and I had all two of our dinners on our honeymoon because we had gift cards) and then visited the Thunder Junction All Abilities playground. (I've been wanting to take the kids there forever, and I was so excited to finally get to go with them!). The second day of driving we stopped at Seven Magic Mountains outside of Las Vegas. That day of driving felt like it took forever, but we finally made it to the super nice Newport Marriott where we stayed with everyone. There were FIVE pools and 2 hot tubs at the hotel and we tested out all of them while we were there. We were also only a mile away from the beach so we spent a day at the beach where the boys got beat up by the giant waves and I spent the time stressing about keeping the kids OUT Of the waves. We spent one day at Disney and the best part of the day was when the girls got to meet Tinker Bell in Pixie Hollow. The girls did NOT like the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, the pirates were too scary. But they did enjoy the teacups (which they did with only me because all the other adults were too chicken to do the teacups haha). Ryan and I went on space mountain and decided that we are getting old and that roller coaster is not as fun as it used to be. In the afternoon Ryan and his Dad and Tressa and Preston took all the little kids back to the hotel for dinner and bedtime and I stayed with Lisa where we went on as many rides as possible before the park closed at 11 pm. We waited all day for a chance to go on the Starwars ride, and it was super fun, but I feel like it was wasted on me because I don't even like Starwars. I walked 23,796 steps on my Disney day. On one of the days we tried out a seafood place with great reviews and the food was delicious! Ryan and I try to make sure we spend a lot of money on seafood at least once every time we visit somewhere near an ocean coast. 


Can you believe this isn't a real ice cream cone? 😂


















June: Spanish Fork Canyon - This was our second camping trip of the year. The plan started as a campout with our friends the Nanto's who have twins Rose's age. We went on a campout with them last year, but then some of our other friends from church found out about it and we invited them and kept inviting until we ended up camping with 7 families and it was SO MUCH fun. There were so many kids running around playing in the dirt and the adults got to hangout and chat for most of the night. It was also oh so beautiful outside and the weather was perfect. June is my favorite month for camping. 










August: Camping in Spanish fork - We had so much fun at this campsite, that we booked it again so that we could camp as a family for 2 nights instead of just one on Ryan's days off in August. Tressa and Preston were going to camp with us on our first night. So, we met at Red Ledges to hike around and were going to head to our campsite afterward, but an insane rainstorm came rushing through the canyon at the end of our hike and huge hail stones were pelting down on us. We checked out the campsite and were pretty concerned about flash floods, so we decided to go home for the night and come back in the morning rather than try to camp through a rainstorm and get rained out in the middle of the night with 3 little kids. We went to Texas Roadhouse for dinner and then went home. In the morning we came back to our campsite and set up the tent. We played by the creek, then put Quinn down for a nap and played Uno at the table. Our friends Ralph and Madison, and their daughter Emmeline joined us for the second night. We at dutch oven lasagna and had so many treats. After putting the kids to bed we played card games until we got tired of the mosquitos and went to bed.  




















August: ward campout at Rock Canyon campground - Our 4th campout! This was a ward campout, that was actually a stake campout that was poorly planned or communicated. We wanted to go but received very few details. It turned out to be several miles down a really rough road. We weren't totally sure out van would make it there, and then when we did make it we realized we didn't know the campsite and there was no cellphone reception. We eventually found out where we were supposed to be and a lot of our friends from church were there too. Ryan had to work that night, so he drove us there, set up our tent, ate dinner with us, and then drove to Salt Lake to go to work. Then after work he drove back to our campsite, took down the tent for us, and drove us back home. He's the best. Just getting to the campsite took almost 45 minutes so he spent 3 hours driving on that horrible road in 2 days, and also drove the 45 minutes to and from work. And worked all night. But the kids and I had fun! 😅









September/October: Round Rock, TX - The kids and I went to Texas again for 2 weeks at the end of September. September is a really nice time to visit because it's not as hot as it is all summer, but it's still warm and all the pools are still open. The flight there and back went SO MUCH smoother. On the way there Quinn fell asleep on my lap for 45 minutes! It was an airplane miracle! Some of our trip highlights are: making mud cakes in the backyard (Quinn was a huge fan), taking a trip to the beach. (Beach highlights: the rental home had a pool! We rented a buggy that we could drive around Port Aransas, and had so much fun exploring and driving to the beach. My dad and I took the girls to a really cool museum where we got to see sea turtles and birds. We spent every evening at the beach until the sun went down and then we had pool parties at night and my dad made fun sodas for us to drink. The kids then crashed very late at night on a sugar high. Which was TONS of fun for them.) Back to Round Rock highlights: we fed the ducks in the neighborhood pond and also lots of turtles, had a fancy Halloween dinner on December 1st with dry ice in a cauldron and witch hats hanging from the ceiling, we watched general conference and ate lots of snacks, I got to go to my the oil painting class I used to go to years ago and painted two pictures (one for my mom, which I finished, and one for me, which I didn't finish and is sitting on the floor of my room and hopefully I will finish it someday), we had a playdate at the pool with our Texas friend, Kaely and her kids, and we had an unfortunate trip to downtown Austin to get some soup dumplings, which was highly stressful with 1 grandpa who is never stressed out, 2 very anxious people (my mom and I), 3 little kids, parking meters, 1 hour time limits, and Carson who I promised pizza and then realized when we got there that there wasn't any 😬😬😬. We decided we won't be doing THAT again. 











October: Bryce Canyon, UT - Our last big trip of the year was to stay at Ruby's Inn near Bryce Canyon. We had 2 hotel rooms and 6 adults and 2 kids and 2 babies. We hiked at Mossy Caves the first day, and Bryce Canyon the second day. The view were spectacular, the weather was better than we expected (but still slightly cold and windy). The hotel served a breakfast buffet which was great, but our dinner options were limited so we had burgers one night and pizza the next. Hiking in Bryce Canyon was probably one of the hardest hikes Rose has ever done, but she did SO well. I learned that the time goes by quicker (for both of us) if I make up stories about fairies and unicorns that live in canyons. At the end of the hike Rose told me that she NEVER WANTS TO HIKE HERE EVER AGAIN! But the next day she told me she had a fun time and would love to go again. I was really proud of her for hiking so far. We stopped in Cedar City on the way home and were able to get Jason and all of his kids together for a pizza lunch at the park for the first time in years, before we hit the road again. 










15. What do you wish you'd done more of?

We honestly had a really nice year. We hiked a lot, camped a lot, went to the beach twice, went to the pool more than ever before, I exercised more than I ever have. The things that I probably should have done more of: personal prayer, meal planning, budgeting. 

16. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Number one: phone use. I really wish I could figure out a way to be less interested in scrolling through Instagram and Facebook Marketplace as much. I did better than usual since I did no social media in July and December. And I didn't use social media most Sundays either. But the rest of the year... yikes. I need an Instagramer's Anonymous group. 

Number two: complaining. In 2024 my goal is to be more grateful. Especially for things that are not fun. I want to set a better example for my kids of having an attitude of gratitude and resilience when things are hard. 

17. Compared to this time last year, how are you different?

For the most part, I'm probably pretty much the same. But I have made definite improvement in being patient with my kids, in letting some things go, in being more prepared to get out the door on time with 3 kids. My hair is longer, but it needs a haircut. I tried out some new contacts (which are clear, so I don't look any different, but I've been using Acuvue Oasis since I was 11 and I switched to Total... but I might switch back the next time I get contacts haha). I weigh more than I've ever weighed before (not counting when I've been pregnant), but I've also worked out more than I ever have in my whole life, so I'm telling myself that the extra weight is muscle 😂 I'm definitely getting stronger and more capable. I have a hard time accepting my post pregnancy body x3 and some of the changes that I've gone through over the last 6 years... but at the same time I don't worry about it as much either. It's funny that in middle school and high school, I was obsessed with the way I looked and never did feel good enough, I probably weighed 110 lbs and my hair was so much healthier and there was nothing wrong with the way I looked. Yet I wanted to wear a paper bag over my head and never let anyone look at me because I thought I looked so horrible. And now when I look back at pictures of myself back then, I can't believe I ever felt that way. And I'm sure that someday I will look back at myself now and think the same thing. All that to say, I do feel like I'm maturing more and more every year, and maybe it's that I don't have the time or energy to work so hard to look a certain way or to dress up really nice all the time, but I'd like to think that part of it is that I'm getting better at letting go of the things I can't change and learning to appreciate and accept and even be grateful for the body I do have and all that it has accomplished. 
I'm also more confident in my ability to make friends and to be a good friend and I've made serious progress in not allowing my social anxiety to stop me from making plans and spending time with new friends. 
Oh, and I have a new calling. I was the ward music coordinator for a while, but now I get to be a ward missionary. 

Here is a photo that Rose took of me in May at Emily's wedding. It's probably one of the only pictures taken of just me all year 😅


18. Compared to this time last year, how are you the same?

Everything else is the same 😂 

19. What's a life lesson you learned this year?

The biggest life lesson I learned this year: when you pray for patience, God does not just give you patience like a gift. 😂 I probably should have just known that, but what actually  happens when you pray for patience, is that God gives you a difficult circumstance and you get to PRACTICE being patient. Which at first doesn't LOOK like patience, in my case it looks like me snapping at my kids. Over and over and over again and feeling like a dummy who just can't get it right! And then slowly getting better and better at taking a breath before talking or working around the circumstances (like getting 3 kids ready to get out the door or when all 3 kids are tantruming all at the same time) that make me feel frustrated or stressed. I've been really practicing patience for the last 2 ish years and I feel like I'm making serious progress. But it's a learned behavior. It doesn't just magically appear. It takes effort, it takes repetition, it takes a game plan, it takes talking it over with someone like a therapist, coming up with strategies, practicing mindfulness, prayer, prayer, prayer. I don't know why this surprised me so much, but as soon as I realized that I wasn't going to just "get" patience from God, it became so much easier for me to give myself grace, let go of some of the shame, and move forward. When I make mistakes I tell myself "this is just a part of the process of learning to be patient. I made a mistake, but next time I'll be able to learn from this mistake and do a little better." And I have to remind myself (more often Ryan is the one reminding me) that I'm not supposed to be perfect RIGHT NOW, I'm just supposed to be on the path to perfection which is a really, really long path. I don't know why I put so much pressure on myself to be perfect now, but I'm really trying to remember that part of the purpose of this life is to learn and grow, and that means I'm not going to be perfect right now, and that's okay. I have time. 

Family selfie while taking a hay ride around a new (to us) pumpkin patch in October. 


2023 Statistics
# of camping trips: 4
# of books read: 71
# of pictures on my phone: 19,534
# of videos on my phone: 3,112
# of times I've wiped bums: 59694880783748294458412749375844
# of times I got sick this year: 4 or 5 (cold in the spring, allergies in June which turned into 1 week of a sore throat, 1 week of losing my voice, and then 1 week of a sinus infection, cold again in November, and then again in December.)
# of hours my kids spent at child watch (my very favorite thing about the rec center): about 140
# of times I've argued with Rose about the importance of learning to read: 78973197803489
States visited: Utah, Idaho, Texas, California, Nevada, (does the very tip top corner of Arizona count?)
Weddings attended: My sister Emily, My cousin Austin, Ryan's adopted step brother, Trevor, and My cousin Kinsey. 



Other Noteworthy things:

Ryan - Ryan had a busy and big year. He worked hard all year on his degree and graduated from UVU in December with a degree in Family Science! I am so proud of him. He's worked so hard for years, working 40-60 hours a week while also taking a full load of school classes and being a great dad to our 3 kids. He also won a watermelon eating contest (no contest, he ate his watermelon so fast and one of his competitors used to play on the BYU football team!). He participated in 2 Spartan races one in Las Vegas and one in Utah. He participated in SWAT comp finally, he's been wanting to do it with my cousins for years. He also went to an Archery competition with his friends. He started Jiu Jitsu and I think he's the strongest guy in most rooms. (But I'm not biased 😉) While he's at home he can often be found being used as a playground for our children. Here are a few of my favorite pictures of Ryan from this year. 









 
Rose - Rose turned 5 this year, she's been such a good big sister with Quinn and has been so helpful and sweet with him all year. We started homeschool Kindergarten in September and she made a lot of progress with her reading which has been my main focus. Her favorite thing to learn about is science. In the beginning of the year she told me she wanted to be a scientist when she grows up, and then specified that she wants to be a scientist who studies rocks/fossils/crystals. Then she decided she wants to be a performer (of dance), then a woodcarver, and now she's decided to be a paleontologist. She has literally gained leaps and bounds in learning how to jump from high places. It took her a few years but now she can often be found jumping as high and as far as she can off of anything solid enough to jump off of. (ie our couch, concrete walls, chairs and tables, stairs, etc). Her favorite color is pink pink pink. She pretty much only wears pink 24/7 365 days of the year. The only exception is when I bribe her to wear something else for pictures. Rose loves writing notes and letters and drawing pictures for anyone and everyone. She is always coming up with gifts that she can give to her friends and teachers. Rose and Lucy are the best of friends (but if you ask them they will say that they hate playing together!) All day every day they are playing pretend together and coming up with the cutest little games and activities to do. Rose has the ideas and Lucy happily follows along. 









Lucy - Lucy hit her precocious 3 year old phase this year. She talks all the time and is so sweet with some serious spice on the side. She wakes up at the same time every day and at 8:31 am every morning (when her star light turns green) she comes into my room to tell me that "it's morning time!", she likes to pick out a gogurt ("squeezy yogurt") and bring it to me to open. For a while she worked on a United States puzzle every morning and could remember the randomest facts that I would share about each state. (Las Vegas - "that's where dad did his Spartan Race!", New Hampshire - "Madison is from New Hampshmer", Arkansas - "Mikayla is a missionary in Arkansas!"). Lucy loves to do anything that Rose does, she likes to dress up in "bootiful" clothes. So I can't pick out her outfits anymore because she has strong opinions about what is and is not "bootiful" We potty trained Lucy in November and I decided to try to potty train for daytime and nighttime and she did so awesome! She is now for the most part totally potty trained. With mistakes here and there, but everyone makes mistakes. She's also decided that she also wants to learn how to read, so we started at the beginning of the reading book and she has also made a lot more progress than I had expected from a 3 year old.  Lucy loves Kitty Softpaws (from Puss in Boots) and Princess Peach (from Super Mario Brothers) she will often walk over to me and say "I'm actually Princess Peach, I had to come here because Bowser wants to marry me but he destroyed my castle, so I decided to come here... Wow! Your daughter Lucy has the same clothes and toys as me!" Her imagination cracks me up, but she also gets really distracted and has some serious selective listening when she gets into imagination mode. 













Quinn - Grew so much in 2023! He learned to walk around 14 or 15 months old (our fastest walker!). He loves to walk around looking for weaknesses in the house. He's our first kid we had to buy child proof cabinet locks for, because the girls always listened when I told them "no!" when I tell Quinn "no" he looks me right in the eye and keeps on doing whatever it is he's not supposed to do. 😂 He completely shattered my 30 + year old pyrex 9x13 dish, which is pretty impressive and was also totally inconvenient. He rubs his ears when he's tired and he love loves loves his swaddle blankets and binky and stuffies. He reminds me of Linus from Charlie Brown when he walks around with his blanket and his fluffy blond hair.  He's figured out how to climb things like his high chair, kitchen chairs, the couch, tables, bookshelves, etc. He really stresses me out sometimes haha. He can also throw really well. He's got the best arm of any baby I've ever seen. (He throws better than Rose and Lucy, haha, which isn't really saying much, but he's good!) We discovered this year that Quinn is allergic to dairy, so we've been trying to figure out what to feed him, but it's tricky. He mostly just always want's "COOKIES!" He's hilarious and has so much character. We just adore him, he makes us laugh all the time. 














A "few" (haha) other favorite photos from the year:

























*root beer*

















Orem Temple Open House

We spent a good handful of weekends visiting Grannie and Papa and Grannie read lots of books to the kids. 






















And that's a wrap! I can't wait to see what 2024 has in store for us!