If you know me, you know that I really struggle with my pregnancies. Not that they are harder on me than anyone else, but just that it is really hard for me to deal with the discomfort that comes along with pregnancy. This pregnancy was probably my hardest by far, mentally and physically. I had pretty terrible morning sickness and had to take extra medicine to cope with the never-ending nausea (my morning sickness with Rose was way worse though, nothing can top that miserable period of my life), my body hurt from the beginning of the second trimester (body aches, hip pain, back pain, joint pain, my limbs felt numb if I sat in any one position for too long), I was incredibly frustrated all the time, more than I can remember ever being, I had a really hard time sleeping the last 4 months before the birth because Rose woke me up multiple times a night several times a week, and I think I struggled with some perinatal depression (not that I did anything about it though because I didn't really know how to go about getting help.) There were many days during the first trimester where I just kept thinking "I'm drowning, I'm drowning." (That's so dramatic, but I really just felt like I couldn't cope at all with my body and my kids and the struggles I was facing). And then I got through the first trimester and I was okay, but still just frustrated with how little sleep I was getting and how hard it felt to do anything.
I wish I was one of those people who felt like pregnancy was just a magical and connecting and grounding experience while I grow a human being with my body, but that just isn't how it is for me. I'm still incredibly grateful for the strength my body has and for how amazing it is for growing 3 wonderful little creatures, but I really struggle to feel grateful in the moment for the struggle that it is.
And my body really is incredible! I survived being pregnant while raising two littles full time, keeping up my small photography business, being supportive of my husband who worked full time and went to school full time, we went camping THREE times during this pregnancy (and only once with actual bathrooms! The other two times I peed in the wilderness and I do not feel even a little bit jealous of pioneer and scripture women who had to do that on the daily), I traveled with kids at least one weekend a month to visit my grandparents or in laws sometimes on my own, after I got past the morning sickness I exercised weekly and went on many walks around the block, and I didn't burn anything to the ground or run away or kill anyone or anything from the rage that I felt from not getting enough sleep and still having to deal with toddler tantrums and defiance and boundary pushing 24 hours a day 7 days a week. So, while I may not get any awards for being the nicest mom this year or running a marathon while pregnant, or anything else super awesome, I did survive and so did the rest of my family. And we are all smitten with Quinn who I will write more about in my next blogpost.
January 2022 - 14 weeks
I kept putting off making my doctor appointment and then by the time I finally got around to it the only appointment they had left was in my 2nd trimester. Oops. So here is our cute little baby from our first doctor appointment.
January 2022 - 16 weeks
Here's our pregnancy announcement. I made a little reel on instagram, but also love these cute little pictures. My family loves when I get an idea in my head for family pictures haha.
January 2022 - 16 weeks
My first bump picture (after a pretty engagement photo session I took at Tibble Fork Reservoir. How pretty is this background? This was one of the first days that I felt good again.)
February 2022 - 18 weeks
Just a random Sunday when the girls and I were coordinating and I felt cute.
February 2022 - 20 weeks
Halfway, and Valentines day!
February 2022 - 20 weeks
Another ultrasound, look at that cute face! This is when we found out the gender. I had this idea in my head that I really wanted 3 cute little girls. And then we found out we were clearly having a boy (I'll spare you the very revealing ultrasound photo that tells us THAT information) and I was DEVASTATED. (Sorry Quinn, if you read this someday I really love you and I always have!) Thanks to pregnancy hormones, I cried in the ultrasound room (a LOT) (also sorry to the very nice ultrasound technician lady who probably thinks I'm a horrible person), I cried for about 2 days and all of our family members kept texting to ask what the gender was and I had to make up something about taking some time to make a gender reveal so they would have to wait because in reality I needed some time to come to terms with this new reality (WOW first world problems) of having a boy instead of a third little girl. Anyway, now you know I'm a horrible person. But I do love Quinn and I think he is the sweetest little thing now.
February 2022 - 20 weeks
Our gender reveal.
March 2022 - 22 weeks
A random day when the girls and I had matching camo pants. :)
March 2022 - 22 weeks
Our camping trip to Capitol Reef where it was freezing and I shared a very small bed with Rose who was so excited to be having a sleepover with me that she stayed up all night and Lucy cried all night long because we were somewhere new and the bed was very small and very uncomfortable for this pregnant lady.
March 2022 - 24 weeks
Ryan and I took a getaway trip to St George where we stayed in an airbnb that ALSO had a very small and incredibly uncomfortable bed. And I left him a review that the bed was uncomfortable and he got all huffy and left us a bad review too. Rude. But the trip itself was nice. Ryan took some pictures of me and my bump at Pioneer Park and a random guy came over to ask if we would like a picture together because if his wife was pregnant he would like pictures with her. So kind.
April 2022 - 27 weeks
Another camping trip, this time to Goblin Valley. I decided that if this is my last pregnancy, gosh darn it, I'm going to take some pretty maternity pictures. So I curled my hair and did my make up (to go camping haha) and bought a long dress and after we set up camp, Ryan and I took off a little ways from our campsite to take these pictures. Ryan did a good job, don't you think? It felt weird to be dressed up for camping, but I'm glad I took these. You don't often feel all that cute when you're pregnant with toddlers running you ragged. I felt beautiful in these pictures.
And less beautiful and a little more white trash the next day haha
I didn't have any outdoorsy clothes that fit my giant belly at this point so I had to wear my stretchy exercise clothes while camping.
April 2022 - 29 weeks
Easter Sunday and my birthday! I requested one family picture :)
May 2022 - 31 weeks
A photo taken by Rose after I cut some tulips in the backyard. I love thinking about how my kids see me. I could wear a clip in my hair to pin down those pesky baby hairs that grow back after a baby and Rose will say "Mom, I love that clip in your hair! It's so pretty!"
May 2022 - 33 weeks
Feeling big and grumpy. I'm smiling here, but a few minutes later I'm issuing threats to my 4 year old and losing my patience with my 2 year old. I forced them to take the second picture... and they lost their treats for it because it was a major battle to get those smiles. From all 3 of us.
May 2022 - 33 weeks
My sweet friends from high school through me the best baby shower! I had so many loved ones and friends come to support me and I got lots of very cute baby boy clothes. (Baby boy clothes really helped me to feel more excited about having a boy.) Rose helped me open the presents and everyone wrote down boy name suggestions, we had some of my favorite foods (fruit was my biggest craving this pregnancy. Specifically watermelon and cantaloupe.) and it was a lot of fun!
June 2022 - 35 weeks
3rd campout to Buffalo Peak with our good friends! We didn't sleep much, but we had a great time!
July 2022 - 39 1/2 weeks
I wrote about this on another blog post, but I asked my doctor if I could go to Bear Lake the last few days of my pregnancy and he said "Why not?" and I was THRILLED. You have no idea. I had been looking forward to this trip for a WHILE and I was devastated when I found out my due date was the same week and I might not be able to go. But I was able to go and I didn't have a baby at the lake! (Which I heard happens a lot on the 4th of July because pregnant women get dehydrated and go into labor. So, I made sure to drink a TON of water while I was there.) I did have some contractions, but I didn't know I was having contractions, so it was fine.
I told Ryan I look like a beached whale at one point and he said "Cutest beached whale I've ever seen" haha true love ❤️ (This maternity swimsuit was a birthday gift from Tressa and I was so grateful for it! And it's so cute!)
Beached whale in her natural/maternal environment.
Last picture as a family of 4 ❤️ All very tired from a fun week at Bear Lake.
July 3, 2022 - Day before due date
Ryan and I left the girls with his dad and left a day early to head 3 hours back to the hospital and check in for my induction. I felt nauseous the whole time and we tried to find somewhere to eat dinner, but everything sounded awful so we bought $15 worth of precut watermelon and cantaloupe at the grocery store which I ate about 4 bites of and then couldn't eat any more because I was so nervous so we drove to the hospital and checked in early.
My traditional very pregnant picture in front of the hospital doors.
I came in style and comfort. So ready for this baby to get out.
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